BLOG: Episode 1 – Welcome to the inside of my mind

My parents used to dread standardized testing days. Not out of worry for their children’s achievement or if the whole process was making the next generation dumber. No, they were apprehensive about what would happen when they picked me up on those days.

So, I talk a lot – like a lot a lot – and my parents have this running theory that if I’m not allowed to talk, then I will bottle up all the words I would have said and expel them as soon as possible. On days when I had a standardized test, my parents would pick me up and I would literally talk until my body crashed and I fell asleep. 

This hasn’t changed with age. As you can imagine, I don’t do well in lockdowns. I still have this urge to talk about literally anything that crosses my mind, but the number of people I can talk to has diminished quite a bit. Now, I’m grateful for phone and Zoom calls and virtual hangouts, but it’s not the same. 

You cannot chat with friends during class (and texting is not the same at all) and work meetings have agendas. Conversations aren’t spontaneous anymore. Everything is planned. And I need to talk to people. 

The people I live with have begun barricading themselves in their own rooms out of fear I will wander into the living room and start a conversation about whatever random thought is crossing my mind at the time. Even my cat is starting to hide from me. 

I do not recommend being the only extrovert in a lockdown with a house full of introverts. 

I’m well aware I am being obnoxious and that I can be seen as annoying at times. But I have thoughts and I’ve decided that I will channel my inner Carrie Bradshaw and make conversation with a computer screen as I type this blog. 

It’s not ideal, but lockdown is slowly making me lose my mind and I have literally run out of people who I can force to converse with me. So, in order to stay sane, while staying safe, I welcome you to “Extrovert in Lockdown.”