BLOG: Episode 7 – In this town, ‘Real Housewives’ is peak TV

I don’t believe in God, but I do believe in Andy Cohen. 

Just kidding. But for real, Cohen’s grasp on reality television? Iconic. Ryan Secrest could never. Between producing the “Real Housewives” franchise, “Top Chef” and “Millionaire Matchmaker” and hosting “Watch What Happens Live” and literally all of the reunion shows on Bravo, Cohen is a genius of reality television. However, he’s never mentioned alongside television greats like Shonda Rhimes, Ryan Murphy or Donald P. Bellisario. 

Odd. 

But not really. 

Reality TV is trashy. It’s low-brow. It’s desperate. 

Moreover, when people tell you shows like the “Real Housewives” franchise are a waste of time or constantly ask “How can you watch that filth?” they are really saying reality shows aren’t high-brow enough to deliver actual entertainment.

However, I argue that reality TV is just as problematic, delightful and good as any other scripted drama or comedy. While these shows involve real people and their real lives, a lot of what’s aired revolves around scripted scenes and production interference. “Real Housewives” and shows like it exist in the uncanny valley between the real-world and the cutting room floor.  If you don’t like reality shows because it’s “not your cup of tea” or because you don’t like the characters, more power to you, but you cannot say “Real Housewives” and shows like it aren’t good TV.

There are more similarities between “Real Housewives of New Jersey” and something like “Game of Thrones” than there are differences. You have your House Manzo fighting House Gorga for dominance and the Mad Queen Teresa Guidice attacking people with dragons (OK it was a table but still), the timelines make absolutely no sense and storylines are dropped without any explanation. They really are essentially the same show – one just has better wigs and a CGI budget.

We, the esteemed members of an elevated society free of the prejudices against reality television, get to lounge on our couches and debate about what Erika Girardi knew and theorize on how to make “Real Housewives of New York” good again, and it is truly glorious. Like, stunningly wonderful. Our day-to-day lives can be stressful, especially in a pandemic. Sometimes you just need to be able to peace out for 60 minutes and fly to Potomac, Maryland and listen to highly educated women argue about who was wrong in the Monique Samuels/ Candiace Dillard fight last season.

If you want to dip your toes into the world of reality TV, I believe you should pull a Greg Louganis and dive right into the mess that is “Real Housewives.” Trust me, you will get sucked into the drama and relationships much quicker than you realize. 

Start with “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.” Most first seasons of the franchise are boring, but in this one you get to see the Kyle Richards/ Kim Richards limousine fight. Kyle climbs into a limousine and calls her sister an alcoholic and Kim utters the most perfect line in TV history: “You stole my goddamn house.” It’s genius. 

Note that not all “Real Housewives” shows are created equal. “Real Housewives of Orange County” is excluded from the defense and the praise despite it being the OG series because that show is legitimately bad.

From gifs and memes to Vine and TikTok, the “Real Housewives” franchise permeates throughout social media.